« Welcome to RyderBaile… | Home | Open Water 2: This ti… »

Worst Day Ever

Crash and Burn

Okay, so maybe I was as prepared as I should've been. The night before I stayed up to about 2 am drinking and of course, playing Halo 3 online with the roommates. It had been a rainy day and was supposed to be the rainiest weekend since 2005. If that isn't a recipe for disaster, I just dont know what is.

I wake up around 5:45 am scrambling to get my shit together. My motor rider class (learning to drive a motorcycle) begins at 7am in Camarillo. But I need to be there by 6:45. So, I grab my gloves, jacket, sunglasses, and shoes. But I need boots that cover my ankle. Seeing how I am neither a chick or a cowboy, boots are not in my closet. I grab the only boots I own, an old pair of snow boots, hoping that I wont have to actually wear them. Hope in the car, flip on my lights because it's still dark out, and hit the 101 south.

I arrive around 6:50 and hit the pavement with haste. I roll in, and everyone else is there. I guess they really meant 6:45. Which to me sounds like a crazy notion, especially for a Saturday morning. I'm secretly hoping it begins pouring so the class would be cancelled and I'd be able to go home and sleep. Apparently all of the introductions have been done and the instructor is doing the gear check. Gloves, check. Jeans, check. Jacket, check. Boots, nope. Everyone's looking at my like I am retarded. They told us to make sure we have shoes that covered your ankle and I am the only guy who's not compliant. I tell him I brought backups, but that they're "fucking ridiculous". I run to my car and put on my huge, clunky shoes.

When I return everyone is ready to go. All of the bikes are out, and all but one is selected. I get a little hydrid bike. Half road, half motorcross. It's a pretty small bike but the shitty thing about is that I can barely fit my big ass shoe between the left pedal and the shifter. Not good.

We start out slow, doing the check downs. Okay, so the bike is in running condition. Next we are going to walk bike around. Boring, but next we can ride the bike in a straight line. Start in nuetral, shift into first, nice an smooth, take a few steps and I am off! I am officially motorcyling. We do this like 10 times and I am getting the hang of it. I am now smiling ear to ear. It's break time and I am really, really excited about riding this bike all morning.

We come back from the break and it's time to ride in a huge oval around the parking lot. Now, instead of everyone being in a single line, we are lined up with about 5 bikes behind mine. They'll have to wait for me to go, get to a cone, and then they can go. That makes me a little nervous, havnign people behind me watching and waiting stresses me a out a little bit. It was like back in college when my roommate Ryan would let me drive his stick shift truck and I'd do fine, unless their was a car behind me, then I'd stall everytime. The bike ahead of me goes and gets to the next cone, I start to go. Stall. Try again, jerk-jerk stall. Now I am done. With 5 bikes behind me I am completely lost my composure. Somehow I get to the next cone, stop and get going again. This drill goes for what seems like forever, and I am continually fighting the bike to get it from neutral to first. Somehow, we are able to get to the next drill.

Now, we are going to go from a complete stop and get up to second gear. All of my focus is on shifting from neutral to first. It's all I am thinking about. I barely get my bike going, and then shift from first to second. Downshift at the end of the run and now have to pull U-turn between cones. I slow down, hit the brake, try to counter balance the bike and proceed to eat shit. Yeah, I lay the bike down, pretty much on my ankle (thank God the instructor had me switch my boots), I drive back to the start line, trying not to be all that embarassed. But, c'mon, there are frail old ladies, but I should mention they were probably harden lesbians, riding better than me and I feel like shit. I think to myself, Ryder, you can barely get this tiny bike from nuetral to first. You really need to focus on riding after that point, but I clearly cannot. I take off my helmet, my ego far more bruised than my ankle and knee. Roll my bike out of the line-up and call it a day.

So there you have it. I was given a voucher to go back and try again, but if I do, I need a ton more practice shifting from nuetral to first. I also have to mention that as I unable to drive a stick shift car, I was at a major disadvantage to learn how to shift a motorcycle. So I think learning to drive a stick is a pretty good idea too.

So I guess getting a bike is going to have to wait.

three comments

Are you f’ing serious? Dropping the bike?
Does anyone read this blog or even know about Ryderbailey.com:81?

Clance - 22-01-’08 15:37

My Dear Son:

Nice try! Obviously, you didn’t learn anything about riding a motorcycle as a teenager while on the back of your Dad’s “Fat Boy” Harley, did you? Ladies and gentlemen, start your engines, but not you, Ryder! I would suggest buying an adult-sized “Big Wheel” and practice on soft dirt before your next attempt! In fact, why not set up the bright orange cones at the local park and practice figure eights with your bicycle? Maybe a motorcycle is not for you, my son? Love, Dad

Dad (Email) - 04-03-’08 10:44

I haven’t checked all your sites so far, but those five I managed to look through really impressed me! How long are you in this business? There’s always field for improvement, sure thing, but this is what a good site should be!

cheap ugg (URL) - 24-02-’10 03:52